Lagoon of Leave

I've been slacking on blogging due to being tired at night. I blame one of my medications, but that is a long story for another time. Yesterday was tiring for introverts. We deferred our weekly Zoom with Deb and the Prussian so we could have lunch with one of the Sparrowhawk's high school friends who was making one of her occasional visits from California back to her home town. The lunch went late because it started late, due to problems with her rental car. She wanted to get gas and couldn't find the unlocking button for the gas tank, accidentally opened the hood instead, etc. etc. It's somewhat comforting to know that other people have mishaps too. Eventually we had our lunch, closed down the diner, and moved on to coffee at the coffee shop on the corner.

In the evening, I went with a group of friends to visit one of our number who has recently started treatment for stage 4 liver cancer. We had planned to celebrate her birthday together, but she can't meet with us because of fatigue and fear of contagious things. We took flowers and gifts to her house--having warned her we were coming--and she had just enough energy to come out on the porch and listen to the birthday song and our assurances of love. Then she went back inside to rest.

Today was Madame Day again. I was displeased to find the whole parking lot blocked off for a "special event." They were putting up those tent pavilion things. I had to go back and park in a different lot down the road and walk to her building. This made it way too complicated for me to even consider getting her into the car. I think it was just as well. She seemed paler and more tired than last week, and was fine with going downstairs to the bistro in the building. Shortly after I came in, one of the staff arrived to check on her bad leg. I don't know what the diagnosis is, but she has a swollen and reddened calf that they put medication on. Her socks are way too tight and leave big welts on her poor old puffy ankles. The staff person put an ointment on her skin and removed the horrid socks and replaced them with a gentle bandage-like protective stocking. Madame usually doesn't like this because she thinks it is "for old ladies," but she allowed it today.

We made it down the elevator, which has been repaired, and had just secured our fruit cup, pastry, and coffee, and got through the usual problems of how to pay for it, when she needed to make another trip to the bathroom. I was slightly panicked, because the last time she had an emergency, we had to go down a very long hall. This time, I spotted the staff bathroom, which is just around the corner, not clearly marked, and probably against the rules for her to use, but I didn't care. It's not accessible, but we managed. Then we returned to enjoy our snack, thankfully without any choking trouble. Today's big problem was the same as last week: she doesn't understand where she lives or how to get there. We discussed this in some detail. Also the recurring sadness that apparently her parents are no longer alive. She always asks me what I've been doing, and I have to come up with some interesting stories. Sometimes I think I should just make up a tale that would be more fun than my rather humdrum real life! But with my luck, she'd remember my wilder flights of fancy and start telling everyone I had run off to visit the pirates, or whatever invention I came up with. Back in her room, I helped her change her coffee stained shirt. Even though we didn't go out, I was honestly exhausted by the time I left. I was happy that the music therapist had arrived to lead some singing, and Madame was willing to join that group as I took my departure. "You'll feel better because you're leaving me with other people," she observed astutely, and I admitted this was true. It turned out that the mess in the parking lot was part of some gala to celebrate "Active Aging." Yes, we are all actively aging, but I'm not sure it's something to get excited about . . .