![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Thrush of Flourish
Oct. 2nd, 2017 10:14 pmI didn't get out much today because something is bothering my stomach. Possibly that fish soup that I found in the freezer and decided to try. I was hoping it would be like the last time I found a container of chowder in the freezer. That was from when the Philosopher was here and we grilled fresh whitefish, and I made soup with the remains. When I rediscovered the leftovers, they were delicious. I was so pleased with myself for creating this unexpected treasure, and it also reminded me of nice times with the kids. Alas, not this time. The soup wasn't bad in the sense that it was decayed or nasty. It just wasn't very good. It MAY not have been the cause of my gastric discomfort, but possibly it was. Now I have regrets. All I can eat is toast. I guess you can't go home again, even with chowder.
In my last book-buying spree but one--that is, the one before the one in Madison--I bought Natalie Goldberg's latest book about Zen and writing, The Great Spring. She can go for pages describing things she sees and does--small details, vividly seen. I like that because it refreshes my own vision and makes me look at everything as if it matters. In one chapter, she visits another writer, who has AIDS, and he asks her if all that sitting in meditation has taught her anything about death. She is flustered and doesn't know how to answer. I thought about that question and realized that meditation doesn't teach you about death. Nothing teaches you about death but death. Who knows what it's about until you get there? Everything is like that. It's funny for me, because I'm the one who is constantly imagining things I've never done, places I've never seen. And yet I know that all my worry and planning never takes me anywhere before I get there. Nothing teaches you about having children till you have them. Nothing teaches you about grief till you are grieving. Nothing teaches you about love but love. Or, as Mike Tyson puts it in a much less Zen-like fashion, "Everybody has a plan till they get punched in the face."
And then, speaking of getting punched in the face, Las Vegas. So much sorrow. I'm almost embarrassed to mention, in the face of so many deaths, that I'm really sad to know that Tom Petty has also died. I first listened to his music on my Walkman, back in the 80s when I was working full time--editing madly away to the tune of "Refugee."
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BimMeoICzOA
In my last book-buying spree but one--that is, the one before the one in Madison--I bought Natalie Goldberg's latest book about Zen and writing, The Great Spring. She can go for pages describing things she sees and does--small details, vividly seen. I like that because it refreshes my own vision and makes me look at everything as if it matters. In one chapter, she visits another writer, who has AIDS, and he asks her if all that sitting in meditation has taught her anything about death. She is flustered and doesn't know how to answer. I thought about that question and realized that meditation doesn't teach you about death. Nothing teaches you about death but death. Who knows what it's about until you get there? Everything is like that. It's funny for me, because I'm the one who is constantly imagining things I've never done, places I've never seen. And yet I know that all my worry and planning never takes me anywhere before I get there. Nothing teaches you about having children till you have them. Nothing teaches you about grief till you are grieving. Nothing teaches you about love but love. Or, as Mike Tyson puts it in a much less Zen-like fashion, "Everybody has a plan till they get punched in the face."
And then, speaking of getting punched in the face, Las Vegas. So much sorrow. I'm almost embarrassed to mention, in the face of so many deaths, that I'm really sad to know that Tom Petty has also died. I first listened to his music on my Walkman, back in the 80s when I was working full time--editing madly away to the tune of "Refugee."
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BimMeoICzOA
