GrassBlade of Trill

My plan for today was to energetically and efficiently work on preparations for the arrival of many guests, starting Thursday. There's a lot of cooking and cleaning to be done. However, my day was laid waste by waking up in the middle of the night and having a grief attack that kept me awake for two or three hours. So then I had to crawl back into bed, sleep late, and take a nap later. I wasn't very effective. A friend says we should call it AINTNUTTN, short for Awake In Night To Nurse Untold Tragically Torturous Notions. Then if anyone asks me what's wrong, I can just say it AINTNUTTN.

It snowed a little more last night, and the ground is still white, the sky gray and dreary. OH WINTER NO. I wish I knew how to quit you! I talked to my mother tonight, and she kept falling asleep in mid-conversation.

While I was up in the wee hours, I wrote a poem. It's not that great, but it served a purpose in setting the words outside my head so I could stop crying. Then I had to stay up awhile longer so my nose would unstuff to the point where I could breathe lying down. I'm going to put the poem in here in case it would be helpful to anyone else who is having these feelings. But if you're not already sad, and don't want to be sad, please don't read it, because it is pretty sad. Or so the Sparrowhawk tells me.
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